Yes, I believe that black women should date men other than black men. In general, I don’t think that someone’s race or ethnicity should play a role in your decisions, unless there is some cultural value that dictates otherwise (with the exception of pure and simple hate). This perceived loyalty that prevents black women from entertaining advancements from other men is unhealthy. Unhealthy to the point, where black men know they can rely on black women to always be there for them no matter what. Sorry ladies, but if a man knows he can do no wrong, he will never feel the need to do right. Their brains just don’t work like ours. In today’s society where most men (of all persuasions) are confused about their role in the household/family, it is getting even tougher to find a good, wholesome man with traditional values (that won’t also expect you to be barefoot and pregnant). For black women who subscribe to “nothing but a black man”, this confusion in society makes their situation even more dire.
Now on to my truths. Do I love all white men ? NO!!! Do I know there are racist white men, idiotic white men, pathetic loser white men? OF COURSE!!!! I have always known that all ethnicities have their idiots. However, due to some recent trauma experienced at the hands of black men, who want to make me feel like white men do not notice me, find me unattractive, or do not want me, I will never date another black man again. I do not feel this is the course other black women should take, but it is the conclusion I have come to for myself. I have to qualify that decision, by also stating some historical facts about me. It is kinda sad that I have come to that conclusion, because although I have always been open to other men and have had a blast dating men of all persuasions, as a child I did always want to eventually marry a black man and have black children. Oh well, that phase is long over now and my decision is final. Before you bash me for that decision you need to go and chastise the multitude of black men who have made a public sport out of bashing, exploiting, and dehumanizing black women. I also have to state that although the black men have resorted to using very ignorant and foolish people of all persuasions to attack me, it started with them, so I attribute all events to them. In addition to completely cutting out ALL black men, these recent attacks have made me realize that my lax attitude towards dating men in general, needs to be overhauled. I used to believe that you shouldn’t be too hard on guys, because they’re not that smart, and there are a lot of diamonds in the rough. Now that I have been dating for awhile, and am now on hiatus, I realize the real threat that loose men pose to women. There are very few diamonds in the rough, and women should definitely know what they want in a partner, and NOT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS. It is actually vital to whatever life it is you want to lead. Lately, men have made an art out of convincing women to lower their standards, but I say DON’T DO IT!! Since I have been under attack by these men, I have seen some pretty vile behavior from men AND women in general, even down to justifying rape, and I am no longer disillusioned to think that most men will do what is right. The only thing my aggressors have accomplished is making me realize I need to know, raise, and stick to my standards. They have also made me realize how little you can rely on the next person. Which was a hard pill to swallow, considering I always believed in the good in all humans and fought daily to prove it to my more pessimistic brethren. I really dont want to lose that or become the pessimist that they are, because it is what makes me truly unique and pessimism is tiresome. As a new found Christian, it is actually taught in the bible that you should be weary of other people, but not in complete fear and isolation: Matthew 10:16-17.
I am not sure what I hope to accomplish with this blog, but I am sure it will come out in some way or another.
That’s it for now…
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